It's a while ago that I posted here on my base-weblog. I am to busy with my daily haiku meme Carpe Diem so sometimes by lack of time I don't post here. Today I was re-reading my first English haiku and I love to share a revised one.
This was my first haiku in English ever, I wrote it in 2005 and it became a wellknown haiku. It's even part of a worldwide anthology of haiku and other Japanese poetry forms.
a lonely flower
my companion
for one night
A haiku with deeper meaning, but also a haiku with sweet memeories. Today I have written a revision of this one:
a lonely flower
my companion for one night -
deep silence
It makes this haiku stronger, more in balance I think. What do you think?
See you ... have a nice day!
Namaste
2 comments:
Thank you for sharing...both the original and the revised haiku.
I like both versions,
but can see the richness in the revised haiku.
Peace
Siggi
lovely words...nice lines!
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